Spilling the Beans

Well, the secret's out. Today in ward council after I left early to set up chairs in the Primary room one of the brothers whose wife I am good friends with spilled the beans. He had been talking about how it was unnecessary to send EQ brothers to set up for RS activities when it would only be a table and a few chairs if the sisters were capable of doing it on their own. While I agreed with him, I left a bit peeved because I had sat there for almost an hour talking about non-essential stuff and we hadn't even gotten to discuss the things you should be talking about in ward council. But this poor brother was afraid he had hurt my feelings so he piped up and said to Justin "I didn't mean your wife. I don't mind helping her set stuff up in the Primary. I mean, she's pregnant."

This was the front of a postcard we sent out to extended family

Yep! The word's out! It seems more people are interested in sharing my news than I am (not that I'm not happy, I just find that I'm kind of a private person when it comes to certain things; plus I'm not a huge fan of unsolicited advice). He tried to quickly brush it over, but the Bishop and his counselors who didn't know clutched on to it and wouldn't let it slip until Justin (the ward mission leader and another regular at w.c.) confirmed. I've slowly accepted the fact that by the end of the day my pregnancy would be the ward's worst kept secret. I guess it's about time; I'm 18 weeks and we have "the big reveal" this week.

I think my natural worrier tendencies have been amplified to an abnormal level during my pregnancy. Even though with my previous two ultrasounds the doctor kept saying the baby looked very healthy and very active (and a bit larger than my due date would suggest) and the last appointment when we finally heard the baby's heartbeat confirmed the baby was still in there, I can't help but worry about EVERYTHING. "I'm only going to take a sip of this Coke Zero." "I'm going to tough out this headache and not take the Tylenol." "Crap! How can I NOT sleep on my stomach?!". But early on in the pregnancy Justin gave me a blessing and reminded me that Heavenly Father was in charge of this and that whatever happened is what He knew was best for us and this baby. So when I start freaking out about whether or not I should have cleaned the bathroom with XYZ cleaner, I just remind myself that whatever happens is as it's supposed to be.

A few funny things about this pregnancy though:

We've been referring to the baby by whatever fruit/vegetable it is closest to in size. (we use this chart)  For example, two weeks ago the baby was equivalent in size to an avocado. Thus this post on Justin's wall the other week.

It's supposed to be giving a high five, but my Microsoft Paint skills are pretty pathetic.

 We're big on high fives. So whenever something awesome happens, we give the baby "high fives" too.

While I have had an abnormal appreciation for salt and vinegar and pickle chips, what this kid has wanted most is anything spicy.

I have been referred to as both a "young mom" (mostly from people at work) and an "old mom" (I won't say by who). Who knew 29 was such a divisive age to have your first child?

I guess my fears, fascination and such with this pregnancy is based on the fact that I honestly felt this was something that wouldn't happen and I'm just worried it will be taken away before I get the chance to experience it. As a bit of background, I've been off of birth control for more than two years because my previous OB/GYN said I had so many fertility issues that it would be impossible for me to get pregnant without medical assistance. Justin is still in school for 2.5 more years and the insurance we have through work, while awesome, doesn't cover IVF treatments, so I just pushed it in the back of my mind and while praying it would happen, began losing hope that it would. With two+ years of nothing happening, I figured that my doctor was correct. So Justin and I have been serving in the temple for the last several months. I figured, "well, what better way to fill our time since we don't have a kid to fill in our time not occupied by school, work and callings?" Lo and behold, that's all it took to get a little bit more divine assistance!

So now that the word is out, what are your bets for baby? Boy or girl? We would be happy with either. Justin's felt the whole time that it would be a girl. I've gone back and forth... We'll see on Wednesday!